This Was Supposed To Be A Game
by It's Blackfrost
Summary: " You're not that agent Romanova I met. you said-These emotions, they-they're distractions, right! You weren't supposed to feel that way! This was supposed to be a game." "Was. It was a game. Now not." "A Fairytale Called Blackfrost Series." It contains triggering emotional scenes. (You know when Loki's fucking stubborn) also romantic and intimate stuff(The good stuff) Loki/Natasha
1. 1 Dance With Me

'A Fairytale Called Blackfrost Series'

'This Was Supposed To Be A Game'

Chapter 1

'Dance With Me'

It's not every day you got to wear that damn 'sexy-hot-bitchy' gown with backless back -Right! ALSO add that so horizontally challenged HECK-heels! And today was one of those chances.

Natasha would have been so pleased if pepper was beside her for some, you know 'girls talk.'

But alas she wasn't. So that leads to that now; huff… her company for today will be those five toddlers that are with her(somehow?) to this so… 'Victorian-era-royalty' party that a normal person would not even get a one FUCK chance to enjoy in life. Thankfully her life was not-so-normal so she got one chance and she does not want to waste an ounce of it; but can anyone stop these kids from pouting at each other!

Fuck guys.

"Honestly I don't even know why you two…" Tony put his forefinger between Natasha and Clint. "…doing here."

"I slam this question to you too stark." Clint folded his arms on his chest.

"Ouch!" Tony rubbed his forearm.

Natasha rolled her eyes as she concentrated her gaze on the cherry that was in her wine glass.

They're just….kids.

"Actually…. I was kinda _invited._ Now yours.."

Yeah, why wouldn't be the zillionaire not present on this party now it makes sense, pepper would have been busy so Tony would have asked Bruce and yup so that's how they both are here. But still Thor?

"We've been told that in this party last few lefts of Oh- Hail- Hydra are present." Clint shrugged so did 100-year-old virgin.

Am I talking like Stark?

Tony picked up his second glass of scotch. "So what are you gonna do?"

Clint too took his first wine glass. "We'll observe and watch."

Tony frowned. "Wait wait you guys would just wait and watch... what? When they'll blast off this whole palace." Thor raised his brows and Natasha shook her head.

"They will not do such thing Tony…they do not have enough fund and for that only they're in this party to make deals with people so to raise their funds," Steve explained.

"Okay… None of my business I confess I don't know the MNO of espionage." Tony raises his hands.

"It's ABC Stark."

"Would it change anything if I say MNO."

Steve just waves his hand in the air.

Natasha still does not know why Thor was here, somewhere she knew but what she thought she does not want it to be correct.

Actually she does want it to be correct.

Her eyes roam throughout the palace hall. It was colossal; the ceiling was covered with elegant patterns so were the walls with colorful glass shards mosaic paintings like things.

Really she has no brain of art and not even the right vocabulary to describe it's beauty.

Well, she knows one who has the right vocabulary, phrases and the mind of art. Overall he whole is a masterpiece.

Well! For her he is.

"Thor how you are here?" she heard someone ask Thor. Who? She doesn't notice maybe it was Tony.

"Actually Loki was invited here. The invitation was for two. Sigyn and Hlin both were busy so I came with him."

Everyone nodded. No one was really shocked to listen that Loki was invited. (Of course, he was a minster in the council of Odin or whatever also he was the ambassador of Asgard for…. What? Cereals…NO maybe some sort of knowledge trading, what that is called? Education and research sharing…- hands off- she doesn't know)

After the glorious battle with Thanos, Loki saved the whole universe from the mad titan -That battle would going to be written in books and foretold for centuries and surely Loki's name would be written with golden ink as told by Thor on their whatever sacred 'Asgardian book of honor' was there.-

And everyone knew Loki was redeeming himself for whatever he did in the past under duress or not. Now he was back in his Prince of Asgard position, his relationship with his father was improving; with Thor too. According to him, Loki was becoming like he was before and yes even avengers witnessed it now. That megalomaniac was far left behind. And now he...

Wait!

Thor came with Loki. Right!

So it means Loki's here! Where?

"Then where Lokes is pointbreak?" she noticed a question came from Tony.

"Loki said he had some work to do I saw some mischievous glint in his eyes I do not mind asking further."

So Loki was up to some….mischief.

Hmm…

Thor smiled but it did not last long as his face got stiffed. "He's getting better day by day but still it is far from my satisfaction."

"Thor these things…trauma and all…heals with time and fades as the years' pass." Bruce who was quiet till now spoke.

"I know Banner but it still pains that I was not there for him when he needed me the most….. He trailed off.

Steve put his arm on Thor's shoulder "Thor it's not your fault for what happened with Loki. Stop blaming yourself didn't Loki tell you that?"

"I know what you are saying friend Steve but…. Yesterday before arriving, at night. Guards come to me running saying Loki's chamber door was closed, not opening and he was screaming and shouting. When I came the door was opened and he was sitting silently on the bed. I asked him about the nightmare but he dismissed and said he was fine and I do not need to worry about it. He just masked his face… again. He didn't tell me. He didn't trust me to share. He still hides things from me and it hurts."

"He hides things from you Thor not because he doesn't trust you But because he doesn't want to burden you with his problems. He thinks you and everyone have already suffered so much because of him. He somewhere still blames himself. He still thinks he was weak and this all happened because of his weakness."

Everyone nodded to Banner's study on Loki's mind physiology.

Yes banner was right that was the whole point why Loki was so privy and secret but that was one of his personality –that mystical oasis type- that make him such an interesting character – and a god-

_Indeed I love being privy but I also love invading other's privacy, Agent Romanova._ Someone whispered; in her mind. How?

Natasha turned her head here and there but no one to be found. She mentally shrugged herself and raised her glass to sip more wine but she sucked nothing but air. Glass was empty, just the little glassy cherry rolling inside.

Natasha wanted to have another glass but when she was about to put her empty glass on the counter; it was filled. What?

Something's fishy.

She takes that glass and with a whole gulp, the wine inside emptied it. She only realizes later with a choke that she swallowed that cherry too.

Was it with seed or without?

Before she could think about that matter anymore, her eyes widened as the glass got filled again.

"Hello, my little avengers." A familiar smooth British accent voice reached her ear as she connected the dots.

Oh… It was him.

_Yes…it was me. _Again that whisper but wait! It was his voice. Right! But he's right in front; smirking like hell like he's living his life.

Wait! Is he inside my mind?

_Yes_. Let me be alone in my mind… got out!

_I am afraid I can't._ What?

"Loki you came I thought you'll miss the party." Thor clapped his hand behind Loki's back.

"Coincidently even I thought the same but my unfinished businesses got finished just in time."

Did he wink at….

_You._ Oh god! Now he'll do the double talk in the practical sense. Wonderful!

"So what earth's mightiest heroes were talking right before I indulge them with my presence?"

Talking about your ass.

Natasha takes a big gulp of wine again but it again got refilled back. Loki took the wine glass from her hand.

"Thank you." Loki innocently smiled at Natasha as she shot daggers at him.

"Nothing exciting we were just discussing how pain in the ass you are in our lives."

I love you Clint. I might give a smooch to you.

Loki stares at her but when she looks at him he glanced away.

"Yes, your Asgardian pain in the ass." Loki muttered.

Natasha bit her inner lips, preventing from forming a smiled.

"Hi Widow."

"Hi Tyrant."

Loki walks towards Natasha and stopped at arm's length.

"How many men you ate today?"

Natasha squinted her eyes as she picks up the wine glass from his hand and sip. "I didn't count my food when I eat."

"Then you should."

"Are you my dietician now?"

"No…" he takes back the wine glass and took a sip. He strides one more step towards her. Natasha craned her neck to keep looking in his striking green eyes.

"Actually I want to give you bait."

The rest avengers were just staring at how one agent, one ex villain both master manipulators playing some sort of wine-sipping from one glass game. They can do nothing but just roll their eyes and just get amaze for what they are about to hear next.

But how the hell the glass hasn't been emptied yet?

"Why, to trap me?" She slowly said.

She can swear she didn't want to sound breathy or seducing. It just…happened.

"Again not…" his long fingers entwined and fiddled with her one long red curl. "…To catch you"

He always fiddles with her curls and she hated it (love it) but what she more hate is that she never stop; can stop him.

Argh….. why?

_Cause you don't want to my little spider. _He's still in my mind

_Yes. _Fuck

"Aren't both one and the same thing." He drops her curl on her face and clutched his hand behind his back.

"For me; not"

"Then show me the light my lord and tell me the difference."

Why's she sounding so breathy?

Loki comes one more step closer to her and now their chests were touching. Natasha's gaze now falls on his suit; suit that he was wearing.

Plain green silk shirt under that black suit with embroidery of green and gold thread all over. Black green ombre colored tie precisely settled and disappear under his tuxedo. She just wanted to run her hand over his suit and squish that silk shirt with her hand until it gets crippled.

"If I did then my lady I would be unable to catch you so that would give me no choice but to trap you, which I do not prefer that much."

She gulped something.

All she could now think of was that smoky-earthy-cinnamony scent of his. Oh… that's so unique. She wants to smell that smell for life, until her last breath. His bed sheets surely smelt like him. Oh… she wants to his bedsheet.

Now she's talking like Lady Shakespeare.

No Natasha no control, control yourself. See that smile… she that…..

Smile.

So beautiful, so dangerous.

Natasha! Control!

Yes. Yes.

"Neither you will be able to catch me nor trap me." Natasha tried to sound as confident as she can.

Why he's still smirking at her?

Loki with his index finger trace her cheeks and stops when reaches her chin.

"We'll see."

What see?

"Hey kids! There are some old people, of course, I'm not one of those but still, and can't you both just take a room and do your sweet nothings there."

"Friend Stark there are no old people beside us."

Steve put his head down to prevent showing his smile while Brue and Clint chuckled at Thor's not getting Tony's said tease.

Both Loki and Natasha just ignored Tony's jest as well as Thor's comment and kept their eyes locked.

"I'll be back."

Wait! He'd left. Argh…. That teleportation thingy! He just poofed! FUCK! Wait! Did he wink at her... yeah...? He winked at her…

"I don't know what games you two plays every day. Are you trying to woo each other?"

Clint nearly chocked his drink.

Wasn't it too much Clint?

Steve and Bruce just rolled their eyes and Thor as usual not able to understand the earth's horrific language.

"None of your business."

"Yeah I know it's none of my exclusive business but still if not as your dada then as a… younger brother, actually I know that god surely would have some, you know mojo thing for protection but still u too use protection of right! Because no one likes a rushy-hurry wedding and I-"

Tony stopped as he find out the assassin was looking like to murder him right now so he sealed the imaginary zip on his mouth.

"Agent Romanova."

Natasha turned back to see the dark prince standing his arms behind. He leaned his hand forward and she unconsciously takes hold of his hand as he pulled her away from the eyes of their friends.

She should have walked by herself. She should have rejected from holding his hand…yet she let him… no, she only put her hand on his…

Fuck.

She could easily feel that her; their friends were looking at them, smirking maybe smiling she can't figure out her eyes were staring his eyes; only. She could hear a glimpse voice of Tony again jesting something on them like 'Romeo has already steal the scarlet' or something.

Voices became more fade as he continued to pull her away and then they….stopped.

All she could focus now on was his face, his perfect face. Those high cheekbones that were now lifted because he was smiling, a genuine smile, very rare on his lips now was visible. His green eyes were so unique she never had even seen anyone with that green color eyes they were so glassy yet warm and gorgeous.

Actually he was whole gorgeous.

He was the first man she'd ever seen for whom the word handsome doesn't fit at all. He was handsome but the word in whole doesn't fit him. The perfect word to describe his beauty was… gorgeous he was as attractive as his brother but in a different way. Every good-looking man Natasha ever encountered in her life, no one was like Loki whether in beauty or personality.

Truly he was unique.

"Dance with me." his deep whispered voice shook her out of her ongoing thoughts.

Should she accept it or not. Accepting his request suddenly would be like she's easy and she's….not but the way he was asking her….that was so warm and innocent BUT there can be a smirk hidden inside that will show up when she'll accept it easily. So…. She'll be difficult.

Oh Hail Sanity!

"Dance with you." Her voice sounded much lower then she'd thought it would.

Loki nodded his head innocently.

He's so adorable….

Don't fall in his trap Natasha! He's using his charms.

"That's what I mean."

"Why? Give one damn reason why I should dance with you." Now it was much louder then she'd thought enough.

Natasha gasped as she felt something wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer to Loki and the net layer on the dress rustled with his suit.

"That's a very good question my little spider. Why…."

His deep smooth voice always gives her some chills; sweet one.

Loki picks up her one red curl and twists it with his two fingers."… I was thinking the same... But then I came upon to discover a pretty little fact that…" he brings his lips near to her ear. "…deep inside my little red want to do the same and she regrets it lately but can't do anything."

She didn't regret it... yeah she sometimes feels weird about what feeling she now felt for this; her ex-enemy but…she not regrets it. She can never regret it. And for that only she felt guilty because she can't; _never_ regret them.

He pulled back and stares at her and smiled.

Has he read what she was thinking? Has he? He was smiling. So now misunderstanding's clear. Hopefully it's clear because she'll maybe never be able to speak that; to him

"Loki...-"

"Today you're going to be really exhausted."

Exhausted.

From what? Dancing

Her thought disrupted as she felt he was behind her slightly pushing her to walk forward towards the dance hall.

"Hey! I didn't give you the permission to dance with me."

"I didn't ask for it either."

'Dance with me.' yeah that wasn't a question but a statement. So what was she doing? Fucking with the stack of hay that wasn't even present! Huh!

And then the time arrived. They've somehow reached the center of the hall. Their legs stopped. Loki came in front of her. His one hand reached behind her back as his cold long fingers traced her bare skin.

Bare?

Oh yeah, she wearing a backless gown.

Then his hand stopped on her waist while his other clutched her hand firmly. She put her hand on his chest and slightly rubbed it. As he takes one step back and she followed forward, she felt everyone around her stopped. Not stopped; gone. She felt it was just her and… him. All… not mattered.

Maybe his magic would have paused everyone around.

Their movements were like harmony, precisely in order; perfectly syncing with the music, the music. Now she realized the music that was being played was different. Again unique; it was concoction and blend of different notes of the low piano and high violin streak at the edge. In between were some notes maybe sound of the flute. She didn't know nor want to; not now.

At the higher streaking notes of violin flowed, he swirled her around and with a jerk pulled her. His hand behind her back was getting lower; more lower and then….stopped. He then leaned forward as she pulled back.

Will she fall? Will she?

_Do you not trust me Oktober? _Was he still in my mind?

Did she trust? She…did trust him, yeah, she trusts him. HECK! She trusts him.

As he pulled her back; perfectly. she looked at his eyes. There was… that in his eyes that she'd seen once...Maybe twice and then never. It was a look of amusement yet disbelief, happiness yet fear… she doesn't find out more; she didn't get to as he swirls her around. The song was now a bit more rushed; maybe it was the ending part

He was a perfect dancer too. What more his hidden talents were? She wanted to find out; she wanted to see every single of his talent. His more personalities, his different expression. She wanted to explore him. Know the real Loki. Not the one that wanted to rule over her world, not the fallen prince, not the brother of Thor or prince of Asgard but...The real Loki.

Will she ever get her this wish to happen? Maybe not… like Loki always says he's god. He'll live for more thousands of years but her…. Maybe a little more centuries and then…. She'll die. If her body was not fused with that super serum then she would've been dead till now…

Natasha gets out of her strings of going thought as Loki pulled her close with a harsh jerk. The ending part of the music was going on, the last few verses.

Natasha frowned as she saw Loki's face; again it was an expression she was unable to make out.

Was it anger? Fear, pain…. She can't tell.

His hand behind her tightened his grip around her. He leaned closer to her. Their legs were still moving; slowly, with the music.

He raised his other hand as it gently massaged her neck while his thumb cares her cheek.

"My little spider." He softly whispered.

"Hmm.…" was only that got out of her mouth.

"Kiss me…" it was a murmur, just for her…just her.

What? Kiss him! Here! Now when everyone's….

There was this….sensations or some sort burbling inside her body mostly down her abdomen and between her legs, that made her felt like a teen girl full of newfound sexual desires for…..She gulped empty.

If she'll kiss him again she'd be counted as an easy woman that she wasn't but… she couldn't deny him either. She wanted to kiss him too but if she'll kiss him now… here… in front of everyone…. Certainly her friends… _their _team. The whole feeling that's she been come across through her way to discover the true Loki... would become real, not just anymore her fantasy or her dark desire… maybe not for everyone out there but… for her… they would become real. As much as she would be happy to accept she would be scared to admit. Her work is….. It doesn't allow _these things_. They are distractions… just distractions….

She looked his face, again expressionless but now she'd observed him much, in all these years, working with him; as a team, sharing same roof (sometimes even food!) He was brilliant in masking off his facial looks but his body always managed to tell his inner story (little bit).

His hold around her was becoming loosed, his breaths were now more shallow and continuous. She could feel his hands were cold.

Was he afraid? Maybe anxious, But of what?

Maybe she knew

And then the song ended. His arms were just about to free her. His eyes were glazed

Was he crying?

Nonono… that was not what she'd thought!

Fuck!

She holds his forearm and shook her head. He tried to flinch but she managed to hold his neck with her fingers she gently massaged his nape. He looked down at her his brows creased in sense of confusion and weariness. He pursed his lips but before he could manage to say anything Natasha crashed her lips on his. At first, Loki didn't move but as the realization of his wish being granted knock-off, it made him relax as he laced his arms around her and gripped her tightly.

Natasha was glad he did it so as she had thought she would've had fallen in the puddle of desires (practically on her knees!) because of that deep intensity he was kissing her.

He was an amazing kisser. Practicing of thousands of years indeed.

But he was a god too! Ohmygod she was kissing a god!

Loki brings his thumb down her chin, massaging her jawline as he tugged her lower lip with his teeth a bit she whimpered and a sensation that of like a current coursed through her body made her knees become water. Hopefully, he will hold her so that she wouldn't fall down.

Lack of air in the lungs made her part her lips in between the kiss but Loki took it as an excellent opportunity to slide his tongue inside her, invading her whole mouth. Her tongue tries to protest but failed by his dominance; his strength over her and she accepted her defeat happily. She was feeling a sudden burning sensation on her throat and her mouth now tasted like hot cider and ginger maybe he would've been drinking scotch before.

The air around them were tensing up, she was sweating heavily. If they didn't stop now she might now loose up all her sanity. She right now wanted to just to rip off their clothes and let her hormones take her off and just her desires to touch him skin to skin again fulfill. Let the world be fuck and everyone go to Hel!

Before she was about to rip off their clothes in reality. Loki slowly pulled away from her. He smirked by the fact that she tried to pull herself to him as he pulled back. They both were panting heavily. But Natasha was breathless way more than him. No one had ever kissed her so deeply and passionately.

Maybe because he was a god and she was…..a mere mortal (ah… it sounds so….little)

What would it felt like when two gods kiss each other? Hmm…

As her breaths were still lowering she rests her head on his chest and his grip around her becoming firm. She knew everyone would be staring at both of them like they were maniacs. Public display of affection always gets cold stares and disgust but this! They just were about to make out here! Was just out of the world thing! She didn't want to look around albeit she didn't care too. She wasn't going to let her man (her man! Natasha what's happening to you?) Think she care for this world over him but little she cares for this world too. He was from outside this world, complete stranger to this world where she lived but she was living here it is her home, of course, it did matter to her what people here think about her….. Argh…..

Why was she having these contradicting thoughts?

She didn't want to go mad!

She cared for this world but for him….. too. Maybe even more. She didn't want to lose him…. she can't even think of losing him but maybe he's isn't the one that she'll loose but she is the one that he'll lose… maybe one day.

She lifts her chin and looked around. The people were there; frozen.

What?

She roamed all around her. The people; everyone around her was unmoving. Some stopped right where they were drinking; even the water in the fountains was stopped. People who were dancing were stopped; like mannequins.

He truly pauses everyone! Like what?

With a Flick of the wrist of his; everyone started to; move.

Everything came back normal people were dancing, the fountains were running, chatting-muttering across the hall got resumed. Her eyes then turn towards her team, looking at her smiling and smirking and then her eyes went back to Loki.

Loki. Loki?

Where'd did he go?

Again- poof-ed!

Huh…. And there she was standing in the middle of the dance hall; awkwardly.

She should think about this somewhere else.

_\- Blackfrost_

* * *

**So that was all guys! I'm quite nervous because you know for the first time I'm posting something here and it's really giving me chills but I have to this and I will so here's the chapter 1 of my Blackfrost Series. I hope you'd enjoyed it. The next chapter will be updated soon.**

**Also, there's this deleted scene that didn't make out the final draft:-**

_This was the scene after Loki kissed Natasha and then leaved her in the middle of dancing floor. Natasha then thought to go out somewhere to think what just happened:-_

She moved her heels and strides back to where; her friends were standing.

"Tony give me your car keys!" she needed to go somewhere else, away from everything.

Steve and Bruce shared a confused glance. Clint looked worried while Thor raised his both brows in confusion surely he would've had assumed that this has something to do with Loki "Wait rush 'woman'! Tell what happened? You and reindeer were talking and then he…" he roam his eyes around "….where did he went? - And now you're too saying to go. What'd you talked did your game finished before-"

"Give. Me. Car. Keys."

Tony reached out his pocket. "Yeah yeah take it." he nagged car keys and throws it at Natasha as she grabbed them in the air.

"Tasha what about the mission fur-"

"Tell him I got ill suddenly."

"Lady Natasha I apologize if my broth-"

"He didn't do anything" Natasha was about to form a smile realizing what he did but quickly masked it off as Steve spoke. "Nat if he didn't do anything then why are you leaving so…."

"Loki has to nothing with this whole fact. I am just tired."


	2. 2 This Was Supposed To Be A Game

'A Fairytale Called Blackfrost Series'

'This Was Supposed To Be A Game'

Chapter-2

'This Was Supposed To Be A Game'

You know in movies or stories when the main lead of the story is tired and exhausted, fully stressed out with life and then he/she go out to get some fresh air in the night because of sleeplessness and then stare at the full bright moon.

Yeah, that….that just happens; in the fantasy only.

Now here she was sitting 'The Black Widow' on the bench of the central park at midnight and it was no moon day. Huh…

She let her body slacked on the bench as her fingers comb through her now messy red curls, with her fingers, she massaged her scalp and claims her eyes to shut. The place was quiet, way better than that awfully chattering and murmuring party hall. She was pleased that she had chosen to go out of that HECK royal party.

She opened her eyes and stare at the sky, there was no moon but still, there were stars; Shimmering and twinkling.

Where'd did Loki go?

There was some heaviness in her chest that can only be gone if she saw him. But when?

Will he come?

Of course he will!

After their shared kiss, she wanted to see his face. What was he feeling at that time? Was he feeling the same like she was? Was he happy? He must be, he was the one that asked her to kiss him and she completed her request.

Today he surprised her! He really can stop the world like WHAT? But if he really was able to stop the world then why did he not used it when the times needed it the most? Like when they were in the battle with Thanos and that other alien spies? Why not that time?

She shrugged herself. That all questions can wait. He will answer them; if he desires to.

All today what she wanted to remember and never ever forget was that dance and the kiss that they shared.

Will they share more? They both had shared kisses before (*cough* they just happened; every time) and that incident when they were on a mission….. As much as she; _they _blamed that incident to be just under the influence of alcohol and just lust. They both knew from inside that they both haven't had any drinks before also there was no lust desire between them; there never was. It was just true tender feelings that were on the waiting list for too much time and needed to done otherwise they both would've had breakdown into madness. But they both never talked about that much, just a conversation (which was too formal) and then they both moved on; actually he did…she not after that, she just stopped….there and then….never moved on, maybe he too did not move on too.

What was this?

Whenever she tried to push up these thoughts from her mind; they came back again and each time, even stronger than before. The feelings she shared now with…Loki….she had felt the same with…Alexi.

Why?

What happened before! She didn't want to let it happen again. No! She just but…. Why…why…

She can't stop them!

Natasha let out a pained giggle as a silent tear managed to escape. She hasn't cried in years. She even let a thought pass out from her mind once that her body has forgotten how to cry and now her tear ducts are useless.

That bastard was a nothing but a pain in ass, yet her heart flutters every time she's with him. Her body felt to tremble with his…touch; she's intoxicated by his smell, his taste.

She was the fucking Black widow! She used to eat men for lunch and now….. She wanted a man to lick her, bit her, and kiss her; her every inch, every day.

Where's the Black Widow! You got that name for a reason!

"Agent Romanova." Natasha tilted her head on the side. An apparition formed from green and black smog glob and a man appeared- _Loki._

"You came."

Natasha saw a flicker in his face as now his brows were knitted and forehead crinkled. "You were crying." He softly spoke.

Natasha wiped out the teardrop with the back on her hand and let out a small cackle. "Now even my body's betraying me."

Loki didn't say anything and walked and sat beside her. He leaned his hand and cleaned the little wetness that was still on her cheek caused by that daring tear.

"No evidence left behind." He slowly spoke and Natasha gazes at him intensely as he did that.

She wanted to say something… maybe why'd he left…no after somewhere… maybe do something.

Gosh! She wanted to kiss those lips again!

"Do you really stop the time?" as she said she quickly click her tongue she shouldn't have asked that this early.

"Indeed I had." She waited for him to spoke something else but when he didn't she asked again.

"How?"

"It was a granted wish blessed to me." She raised her brow and frowned.

As Loki looked at Natasha's bemused look, the corner of his lips lifted.

She looked adorable when she's confused.

"It's a long story."

"… and I have plenty of time." Natasha turned to him and smiled.

She always loved to hear Loki and Thor little Asgardian tales. They were always amazing and funny if you take out the fact of their dysfunctional family matters. Loki and Thor still had a better childhood apart from any team member.

A childhood she longed to enjoy; maybe their whole team.

"Okay, so it was when I was around 520 and thor was 800" Loki turned to face Natasha and as he saw her eyebrows raised look he knew what she meant. "In Midgardian age I was 8 or 9 and Thor was 13 or 14. So at that times like most of our adventures begin, It was started as thor was bored and wanted to go somewhere –but I was not, I was reading enjoying my own world but then he dragged me and said that I was bored too because for him reading was boring-." Loki chuckled slowly as remembering his childhood.

"Thor asked me to take him somewhere, where we can spend good time."

"Before getting back to the story I need to give you a little background. There was an old woman named… Fulgar, she used to live in the outskirts of Asgard. She was a widow with no children but she really was a wise and lovely woman. When I was around 300… around 5, I went with Thor and his friends to the outskirts of Asgard, near the river, Cylin. They were playing with each other, no one even looking at me. I started to roam around the forest and then I found this house from where sweet smell of berries and bread was coming." Loki licked lips.

Knowing Loki for all these years this was one of the most surprising fact she'd came to know about Loki as well as others; Loki had guilty pleasures for sweets like….what?

Villain doesn't like sweets, they are bitter, candies are like poison to them

Again a fact- Loki wasn't a villain-

"I wasted no time to go there and then I spend the of my rest of day with her. I helped her in baking and then she gave me those so fluffy blossom buns and pies and then after that I began to come to her every weekend when she used to bake new batches."

"Now let go back to the real story. So then I took Thor with me to Edda Fulgar and when we reached her home I knocked a few times but… there was no reply…. I became to grow anxious so does Thor by seeing me, and then he broke the door and when we entered we saw a very beautiful maiden standing in front of her, doing some spell maybe that was why she wasn't opening the door. I asked who she was and where Fulgar was. That maiden just laughed and then transformed herself into Edda Fulgar." He snorted.

"So that old woman was a sorceress in disguise."

Loki nodded and continued.

"That time I was young, I got scared and started screaming about where Fulgar was but then she told me that she was her only, I didn't believe, and then she asked me what she should do so to gain my trust. I asked her to bake blossom buns."

"Oh.. I got it you knew the taste of buns, you knew how Fulgar buns tasted." She nodded in understanding.

"Yes and then she baked them and when Thor and I tasted them. They tasted to same I came to believe that she was Fulgar only. And then I asked who she really was she told me that she was one of Norns sisters of fate, she was Verandi, the weaver of the present."

Natasha knew very little of Norns, they were somehow goddesses that decide the fortunate and weave the fate or whatever of people living in nine realms.

Weird. Thankfully Steve wasn't here.

"Then she told me she adores me a lot and gave me three wishes to make, that can- just happen in the present cause she is the…controller of the present."

"So wishes…. So this wish you asked was….."

"This was the last wish. The third one."

"So what you did with the rest two wishes."

"Nothing too honorable"

Natasha arched her brow. "We're talking about honor, are we?"

Loki shrugged.

"Okay… so when I was 10… there was my mother's birthday coming up…. And I was long time preparing for it too. I had gone to Alfeim and from there I had some very rare flowers that are blooms there only… that were, um… everglins, yeah, so when I brought them home. I had hid some under my bed… after few days when there was mother's birthday I take them out they were.. Dried and dead. I got so sad but then I remembered the wish so first time I used my first wish to make that flowers bloom again."

Natasha lifts the corner of her lips high. Imagining little cute Loki…. Mama's boy.

"And the second time?"

"The second time….I rather not say."

"Why?"

"That's embarrassing… and I don't want to be judged."

"There's now hardly any time anyone judges you Loki, you're beyond judgments."

Loki raised her brows he doesn't know to take what Natasha said as a compliment or mockery.

Natasha understood it

"It was a compliment."

Loki just nodded.

"When I was around 13 there was this…. Girl and I… used to adore her much….what you humans say….um….crush…" Loki could feel his cheeks were burning like hel. It was not really embarrassing to tell about his former lovers but… to someone like Natasha…,. It was quite, _not_ _quite_, so embarrassing.

Natasha just bit her lower lips preventing to surpass and chuckle or giggle

Seeing Loki, a god.

The god of mischief.

Blushing like a hell... Was quite a view.

"then." Natasha supports him to speak.

"Okay so… she used to adore Thor. I thought their feelings were mutual but that was not the case. Anyway, I got to know about that a little longer. So….. made a wish that that girl should feel the same feelings that I had for her and at night I didn't know she came to my chamber and suddenly she started to talk and that very night only we become my friend and then…..

"Then what?"

Loki cheeks were burning like the lava of Muspelhiem, not because to tell her what happened afterward (maybe a bit for that too) but what question that will get leads to.

"…she kissed me….and rests to your imagination."

"Wait…what?"

"What what?"

"You both had sex!... I mean wait, Loki when did you lose your virginity?"

"And that was the reason why I don't want to tell you this."

Natasha leaned to him and winked at him to which he groaned.

"Tell me god, when did you get your cock wet?"

Loki bit his inner cheek.

"That time only."

"What that time?" and then something clicked inside her. "Ohohoh…..I- okay, so you loose when virginity when you were- ah…13 with your crush, wait you were 13. Wait… what? You were 13!"

"I was 13 in Midgardian age, in Asgardian age I was 800 years old and to surprise you further Agent Romanova. In Asgard and an average aesir loses his/her virginity at the age of 600 or so I was pretty late."

"Okay okay, I don't want to get in all that… so that was the second wish right." He nodded.

"And the third wish was to stop the time when you dance with Me." he again nodded.

Natasha turned her head and tilt it to stare at the sky again, Loki Too did not say anything but maintain the peaceful hush in the air.

If his one wish was till now still left why he didn't use it ask to kill Thanos or wish something else…. There were many times he could have used that wish… why now? Why with her, _for her._

"Loki"

"Hum.."

"Why your last wish was to stop the time and dance with me…. you…" she wanted to say something else but unable to find words; _right words_.

Isn't the answer so easily observable; so obvious? He thought.

Loki never liked having heart to heart conversations and chants on vulnerable topics they were…so-because he was never good at portraying his emotions; yeah he was silver tongue; _his famed_ _nickname_. But…. when he talked about anything emotional, so related to him_; by heart_. He ended up crying more than saying and after that…. Hah..

Everyone used to think him weak and frail so….He just stopped talking about his personal feeling with others and slowly…slowly even with his mother_. His_ _emotional anchor that kept him… in place._

"Natasha, I- I wanted to have…to spend a moment with you, alone. Maybe for a fraction or few minutes… but I just wanted to be alone, _us_ to be alone where we forget to think of the world around us, just you and me together spending some time, with no fear… no fear of what so ever. Where we do not need to tell people what we are to each other because it matters not- Loki's rest words die in his throat as Natasha pressed her lips on his. Loki let a whimper escape through his mouth as her lips deepened the kiss. Her arms wrapped around his neck as his hand slightly massaging her neck and other her back.

For a moment she had forgotten that they were in the park and on a bench. But as Loki slowly pulled her away make her realize. She was breathing continuously so was he. Their eyes were looking at each other, intensely gazing like seeing each other souls or deepest desires.

She ran her fingers through his hair; short hair. She remembered how hard it was for her and Thor to make Loki believe that he needed a cut. He looked sexy in long hairs but; adorable in short hairs. She unconsciously gently rubbed her thumb on his cheek and smiled as he looked at her with his brows raised and lips curled up in a confused, bemused look. That look certainly made her chuckled.

Being Loki's girlfriend….

Oh no-no lover!

Being Loki's lover….. Doesn't look that bad….

Actually it looks…. Beautiful

She didn't even why she was thinking this all stuff but….. She was thinking.

If she would be with his then it would be…. Her rest all life full of mischief and chaos, but then she would be able to see that adorable face every day. She would be able to see that signature smile, that smirk like every single HECK day!

She would be waking up beside him!

She knows, she doesn't know how but she knows that…..that he would want that too.

And now she didn't hesitate to say that…that maybe she loves him….

FUCK! SHE LOVES HIM!

She truly did!

She loved Loki! That god! That pain in the ass! That ex villain! God of Mischief!

She fucking loved the god of mischief!

All now she needed was to tell him that. It now or never!

Tell Natasha, tell him

Now or never

"Loki." She slowly said.

Loki pursed his lips, Natasha thought he would say something but then he glanced away from her breaking the eye contact.

Something happened, something wrong.

But what?

"Loki look at me. What happened?"

Loki didn't look at her. Before she was about to say something else. He put his long finger on her lips. She just at his face intently, he wasn't looking; still. She could feel through his shallow breaths like he was trying to control himself from; _sobbing, crying._

But why?

Did he read her mind!

He obviously did…but….she didn't say anything ba…

Argh…

Nothing was making sense.

And then he looked at her as she gazed his glistening eyes. Was he really crying? He was trying hard to keep his facial muscles stiff and unmoving; expressionless. But she could tell, from his very own eyes.

Pain, guilt, fear, joy, baffled what else?

Many more…

And then he spoke but it was so slowly like it felt like he was speaking to himself.

"D-Don't say what you are about to, I don't deserve those words."

_And then…_

His mask broke like he wasn't able to carry on the weight of those words he just spoke. So he….. sobbed.

At first, he made a very little sound like muffled but then he began to cry. Tears were rolling down from his eyes and she was just frozen, just looking at him bewildered. She didn't know what to do? She was seeing him in his one of the most vulnerable state.

She wanted to do something but… she didn't know what?

Natasha leaned her hand and put it behind his back gently massages it while her other hold his forearm gently nag it.

"Loki don't-don't cry, please." She said. She was never good with comforting, it wasn't in her trait… or maybe it just got removed out.

But…. she has to something.

She cannot let him, just be…_this._

"Loki look at me." she softly said and brings her hand to his face and gently lifts his chin and turned his face towards her.

It was the first she could see through his eyes, his face. All his emotions were vivid, in front of her.

And…. He was a mess.

_Her mess._

Her other hand leaned to his neck, massages his nape. She wiped the tears that were trailing from his eyes with her fingers but more tears started to fall down. They wouldn't get stop; not that easily.

"I love you." She confessed.

Loki looked down. Tears were now dripping down on his lap.

"I am not w-worthy of those…words, don't say them, you deserve more than…that"

She snorted.

"Yes, you're right I deserve much more than that, then what'd you think? I should date a hound or maybe you could find me a handsome mutt." He didn't look at her.

"Surely they would be better than me; they will be faithful to you."

"Why? Will you be unfaithful to me?"

He turned to her. "What else you'd expect from god of lies."

"First of all you're god mischief not lies and second you'd never lied to me, if I remember."

"I am monster."

"So tell me what this monster feels."

Natasha gets up from the bench and turned to him.

"Do you want to rape me?"

Before Loki was about to say something Natasha spoke again.

"It's dark, nobody here, I am alone I don't have my gun, nor my widow bite", she showed her wrists. "You're a god easily can manhandle, you have very powerful magic you can easily possess me, can do whatever you want. You can easily rape me-" before she could register he stood in front of her, his hand on her mouth, interrupting her from speaking any further. His tears were still visible on his cheeks but his eyes were now dried.

"How can you think that? I cannot even dream to do that to you. I can never." His voice was raw, full of emotions.

She holds his face in her hands. "If you do not intend to cause me harm, then you're no monster."

He holds her hand with his and with other he holds her from behind and brings her closer to him. He let go of her hand and leaned in behind her nape pulling her closer to him. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he brings his lips to her.

He knows he's being selfish but….

He wanted to have her taste on his mouth before he….

_Let go. _

His lips softly touching hers and he pressed them; kissing her. Chaste and tenderly.

Suddenly some green and black colored smog formed around them. When it disappeared she found herself not in the park but in a room. As he slowly pulled back, she looked around. Green curtains, a big king size bed with green and yellow ombre silk bed sheet over it, a fireplace.

A fucking fireplace!

A wall was full of books on the bookshelf and opposite to that a light brown colored wood study table. The room was neat and classy. The room itself screamed Loki's name.

Wait!

Was she in his room….meant in Asgard!

Woah! His teleportation thing is amazing

Sorry Tony but magic is awesome.

Natasha turned to Loki to speak but he kissed her again. This time it was…intense, full of passion, like he was making out of every second like he was kissing her for the last time.

Natasha let a little whine escaped through her mouth as he bit her lip. It was unintentional but when she open her mouth to let the sound release he entered his tongue inside, invading her mouth and she let him, she let his tongue roam around her, tease her own. Her body was struggling for air but she didn't want to stop.

Slowly he pulled back. They both were panting. Loki touched his brow with hers.

"I love you." She murmured on his lips.

_Time's up. Better to stop right now. _"Sentiments." He whispered.

He let go of his hands from her and step back.

What was he doing? Her forehead crinkled in confusion as he turned away from her, staring the floor.

"You're not that Natasha I met. You're not that agent Romanova I knew. These emotions, they-they're distractions, right! You weren't supposed to feel that way! I am- I'm – I- not worthy! I was just using you! I don't feel for you! This was supposed to be a game."

"_Was_. It was a game. Now not." She said as she stepped towards him but he pulled back.

"No-no you heard what I said I don't feel for you. I don't have any affection for you; I don't….._love you." _

"Yes….you don't love me," she said as she walked closer to him and stop at arm's length.

Loki turned and looked at her puzzled. Loki tried to flinch as hands hold his on both side of his face.

"You worship me."

"You're just a mortal."

"A mortal indeed. And believe me I ask this question to myself like everyday about- 'I'm just a mortal.' What did this god saw in me that he cherish and care for me like hell?"

He holds her hands and put them down and irritably shook his head.

"You're not understanding this Natasha, I-I my feeling for you matters not. It's about you! Your life! I don't know if I love you or not or even if I do...-

"Loki! Your feelings matters as much as do mine. It's not just my life or you life now it's our life and you love me! You can love me! You can love anybody! Every one can love and get loved by someone, you're not exception. Sometimes your mind needs to acceptfew things that your heart has already accepted…- Natasha didn't knew that she was shouting until Loki snapped her in between by shouting even louder than her.

"I CANNOT LOVE YOU NATASHA ROMANOFF" He shouted. "I cannot love you or anybody if I'm in this…," he looked at his hands. "Disguise…" he looked at Natasha. Her teary eyes made his heartfelt guilty.

She was crying... for him

"This isn't me. This is not what I am. This is just a mask that hinders the ugly face behind, since the day I born. That ugly face… that even I'm disgusted that I live with it behind this cloak." Tears again began to fall down from his eyes and he kneeled down on the floor.

"'_You fell in love with my flower but not my roots, so when autumn arrived you didn't know what to do'." _He quoted a line from a poem. "You have fallen in love with this masquerade, woman, not what's hidden behind. You adore my angels but what about the demons. _'Nymph's divine people say, but she devours you flesh few tells.' _Loki spoke an Asgardian old phrase. He didn't even get to realize Natasha was beside him kneeling down.

"If I have fallen in love with your flower then I promise I will fell in love with your roots too so when autumn will come I will water them too. If I have fallen in love with this mask then I will surely love what's hidden behind too, I promise. I will adore your angels and together we'll fight your demons." She puts her arm behind him and buried her face in his neck.

"Just believe in me, I promise I will. Just believe me." His body didn't respond to her gestures but she remained there clinging to him.

A few minutes later his body moved. His head turned as he lifts her head to look at him. His one hand rose to care her face as she put her hand on his.

"I believe you, _elskan mín". _He whispered.

She smiled at him she didn't know what was the meaning of last work he spoked maybe that was in his native tongue that got slipped from his tongue.

it sounded so beautiful

_ -Blackfrost_

* * *

**So this was the second chapter I hope you like it. A note I want to mention is that this story is M rated you can easily see it on the rating box. Also, I've put the warning too in the description. Do not read if you do not like it. **

**I don't read thorki because I don't like their ship!  
( hell! Guys, they're fucking brothers! Not by blood but by bond and heart! ) NO OFFENSE TO THOSE WHO SHIP THEM!**

**Also'Elskan mín****'**** means- My Dear (In Icelandic, cause I believe Old Norse is fucking dead and Icelandic language is most close to that RIP Language)**


	3. 3 Like Lovers Do

'A Fairytale Called Blackfrost Series'

'This Was Supposed To Be A Game'

Chapter-3

'Like Lovers Do'

"Then let me."

Loki remained still. Sitting on the floor. His side body was supported by the bedpost. Natasha was near to him her arms wrapped behind his back while other holding his forearm.

Loki's head turned to her but didn't speak a word; his eyes stared at her will a clear expression

_Why?_

"Loki please…let me see you." She let go of his forearm and leaned to care his face. Loki looked at her and glanced away and closes his eyes.

He let her

The air surrounding her began to get cold. As she looked back at Loki.

He let her see him

His face skin was blue, somewhere between sapphire and navy. She intently gaze at the markings that appeared on his forehead and cheekbones. She leaned her hand to trace her fingers over those ridges gently. He was ice cold. But before her reflex could do something he flinched. Preventing her from touching him

"Loki don't. Open your eyes."

Loki shook his eyes and turn away.

"Loki please…"

Loki sniffed and slowly sighs.

Loki slowly lifts his lids and looked down. Natasha lifts his chin and makes him look at her. His piercing emerald eyes were now glossy ruby red. If his green eyes looked beautiful than these were so….._unique._

She doesn't why but she was feeling this amazing exotic feeling seeing him.

He looked Loki but still….so new…so different and uniquely beautiful.

"You're so beautiful." Natasha caresses his cheek with her thumb.

He was cold, so cold like she was touching ice but her hands weren't wet or feeling like she was touching something solid. His skin was still feeling soft and silky.

There was a reason why Thor called Loki his baby brother.

His skin was really….like a baby. (No offense to his manly man thing okay! There's nothing wrong with a man or god having soft skin.)

She never had understood why Loki felt so bad about his skin being soft and also those adorable curls.

Who would have thought Loki would be having curls!

But he kept straightening them

Idiot!

Her hands were becoming numb, but she really doesn't want to take her hand off his face. She brings her fingers to his lower lips and gently traces it.

She leaned her face to kiss him. He tried to pulled back but she tug him towards her. She let a shrill sound escape from her mouth as their lips touched. His lips were cold just like his skin, maybe even more.

She wanted to deepen the kiss but he pulled back.

"I'm s-sorry…it's just in my nature that I'm cold…so cold."

"Did I complain?

He shook his head. "No you don't, but, I-I don't want to harm you."

"You'll never harm me."

"You'll get frostbite eventually if you'll touch me for too long."

"That's in your nature, you species adaptation to survive in the place they live. Touching you has to do nothing with harming. You are born like this, not your fault; you're not intending to harm me."

She smiled and turned to him and put her hand on his face. He tried to flinch.

"I know I will not keep my hand for too long." She assured him.

She massaged his cheek with her thumb.

"…and here I'd made up all the erotic fantasies about how it will be like to making love with you in your this form." She bit her lower lip.

Loki smiled back at her as shift he himself back to his aesir self. Natasha wanted to say him not to but she didn't.

_It will take time._

They both enjoyed hushing silence for few moments until Loki broke it.

"Why you said that?"

"What?" she asked genuinely confused.

"About making love...you'd never used that word before. Why now?"

Natasha pursed her lips to speak but then close it quickly she looked at him but then glanced away and get up from the floor and sit on the bed. Loki followed her and sits beside her.

"Ah…..you know, we just confessed our feeling for each other and- now we are no more that fucking buddies or what people call…um….friend with benefits or something else, I don't know it's just now we're in the new level of relationship what you Asgardian Shakespeare's say mates- oh nono too scientific. It's lovers! Right! So we're lovers and I think lovers make love not fuck each other. Agree."

Loki chuckled and then grinned.

"So we're lovers now. Are we?"

Natasha leaned her hand and slides it over Loki's arm until it touched his hand's back as she locks her fingers between his finger spaces. "What you say?"

Loki raised his dark brow slyly and then looked at their interlocked fingers.

"We are."

Natasha twists her upper body to see him fully. She raised her other hand and cares her face, slowly went down to his neck and rub it gently.

"And lovers don't fuck." Natasha said as matter of fact.

"They make love." Loki said also as a matter of fact.

"Make love." Natasha repeated to herself.

She turned to Loki. Loki was about to say something but Natasha stopped him as she touched his lips with her. Loki was amused by her sudden action but take it with a little smile appeared on his lips between their chaste kiss. She slowly pulled back. Their lips were still just an inch apart.

"Loki…m-make love t-to me." she said between her running breaths.

She was feeling her cheeks her heating up with the intensity he was looking at her.

"Like whom? He purred.

"Like lovers Loki. Like lovers do." He holds her face with his both hand and kissed her forehead. "As you wish, my princess."

oOo

Loki slowly laid Natasha in the center of his bed. For a moment she'd thought he would just throw her.

But…they were making love…right!

Slow, sensual, exquisite & _forbidding?_

Loki half-laid beside her. Few strands of his hair come in front. Natasha's fingers were getting itchy to just remove them from his gorgeous face.

But before she could, He pressed his lips on hers. Slowly and tenderly he kissed her. His hands cunningly maneuver over her body.

She just wanted to tear off that fuck gown so she could feel his professional hands on her bare skin.

She saw a smirk appeared on his lips between their kiss like he'd read her thought.

And fuck he can!

He slowly pulled back from the kiss but she followed him as trying to continue the kiss to which he smiled.

"Have patience, love." Some foreign chills course throughout her body.

_Love_

He called her _love_

He bends down his head and kissed her neck. The intoxicating smell of his reached her nose. Again that ash, cinnamon-y, peppery scent made her body burn inside. Natasha gasped by the sudden sensation she felt as Loki licked her shoulder blade. He did the same to her other side.

A pleasurable moan slipped from her mouth as he sucked her earlobe and gently tug it with his teeth He leaned back to look at her face.

Natasha thought he was about to kiss on her lip again, but she let a sigh of dissatisfaction as he kissed both the corner of her lips and smirked as she showed her displeasure. But her frustration only stayed until Loki nuzzled his face on her nook.

"Loki…" she moaned as her fingers comb through his hair.

As her eyes were closed she didn't realize when he began to plant kisses over her face-eyelids, cheeks, cheekbones, brows, forehead, cupid…everywhere. She didn't know why but Loki's finger was drawing imaginary circles on her forearm that was doing nothing but the soft strokes were lifting her mood. She hummed as pleased with the feeling.

"So my little spider is pleased…" Loki murmured.

Natasha didn't say anything just hummed in a yes.

Loki traced his index finger on her face and stopped under her chin. "Open your eyes, Natasha."

For a moment she didn't want to open her eyes….she felt vulnerable, exposed. Her clothes were still on yet she felt…

Bare. It was….

So unbecoming of a spy

She didn't want to believe it but…

She felt, no she won't, she wants to feel being dominated, wanted to be ruled by him

By her love

Her lover

She was not being racists, sexists or discriminating or whatever.

She just… for once wanted to feel like a…..woman, a woman who needs a man.

Not an assassin, or a spy not even black widow anymore.

Just a woman….

Natasha slowly lifts her eyelids only to find those green ones looking at her and then he smiled.

There was no danger, she was not helpless. She was with him, _safe_. So she let herself be vulnerable, exposed, bare, uncovered in front of…

Her lover

And it felt immense great, delight being

_Loved _

"You're beautiful." He slants his face and their cheeks touched.

It wasn't any intimate action…it was a little gesture of adoration, affection, and caressing for….._her_

This all was so new to her.

Natasha combed her fingers through his hair and slightly rubbed his scalp with her fingertips. Loki put his hand behind her back and slightly pulled her to him and kissed her lips again.

His hand goes behind her back towards the behind of her shoulder as he leisurely pulled down the strap that was holding up her grown. He began to kiss the newly exposed skin while his other hand does the same other side.

Natasha was Fluttering with sensations so she shut her eyes again.

Why it was so slow?

It was so slow and…Sensual.

For a moment she felt little so hesitate as he was pulling down her gown.

She was going to be naked

And she was scared….no she was anxious

She never had felt anxious or nervous stripping away her clothes to naked openly in front of men during her missions. Ever she felt was…..

Nothing

But this wasn't any mission. Was this?

She wasn't doing this to get something, or because it was needed to be done.

Then why was she doing this? Letting him do this to her?

Because…

She loved him…

She needed him…

And she wants him to have her…

She is his

Now she will be his only

He owed her

And she has given herself completely to him.

Her upper body was bare, her eyes were closed but she could feel there was no tightness covering her chest.

As she came to sense to realize she was half-naked, unconsciously her arms folded around her breasts to cover them up.

"Hey, don't do that." Loki raised his hands and with a firm grip on her wrist removes her arms.

Yeah, she shouldn't do that

But she did it anyway

Why?

Why was she feeling so…

Vulnerable

No

So…worthless

Not good enough

She turned her face as a tear rolled down from her eye crease. "Don't do this to me Loki."

"What you mean, love?"

So…undesirable

For feeling so…. Loved

Loki deserved better

"Treating me…like something that's so delicate." Her eyes were closed but she could find out that Loki had removed his hands off her and now was sitting on the bed.

Why she'd said that?

She wanted to feel delicate…frail…maybe just for once.

But then also it felt so wrong….

She never has had felt these feelings, these emotions.

She didn't even know if they're real or not.

They'd made her so artificial

"You are not delicate Natasha nor was I treating you like one I just wanted to make you feel how much I love you."

"By treating me like I'm made of glass."

Fuck Natasha stop saying that!

Why her body was betraying her so much today.

"Natasha you're really special to me. You're like an idol to me. That gives me inspiration that I can also wipe out all the bad that I've committed from my life and can have anew….with you. I treasures you….a lot. That was the reason why I never wanted you to feel for me because my life's so dark that it will swallow you. You'll be never able to get out of it. My life is my own beautiful prison. Everyone thinks my demons are dead but they aren't they're behind me, watching me every day and I can't do anything. You're the only one that gives me reason to live because you fought you demons and now you've left them far behind...-"

"Nononon… Loki I never fought my demons…I just tried to bury them deep because-because….I was weak... But they…they always come out, and haunts me…." Natasha sat up on the bed. Suddenly her eyes felt on the robe that she was wearing. Maybe Loki changed it. She looked at Loki who was looking at her softly.

He understood her

Only he can

If not he, then who else?

"…They're still haunting me, my crimes...Whatever I did…all the blood in my life…it's still there. And I can do nothing with that, my demons are too very much alive like yours…"

She leaned her hand to hold his as he looked at their interlocked hands.

"I didn't mean it what I said before. No even I single word. It's just….everything seems so real and actual and I-I can believe it, no one has ever touched me like this… my whole life's been too much-made up….I just never felt what real is like? And today I felt real…I felt…true. And that sacred me b-because… whenever I had though anything to be real they've...they've always turned out…. _fake._"

Loki shifted towards her as Natasha rested her head on his chest and Loki leaned back to the wall.

"They made me artificial….it feels dirty when someone makes you unmade…"

"I know my love. I know" Loki slowly strokes his hands on her hairs as he sobbed

"I want to feel love, real love but…I'm scared I care for you so much to loose you…."

"You'll not loose me."

"You deserve better."

"I deserve much less than you."

"We can perfectly lie to everyone but each other."

"Because we have nothing to lie for, we've each other's worst and best side; we've each other's deepest secrets and regrets. For what else reason a person lie to his companion?"

"When he's having an affair."

"We both already know no other can handle us like we handle each other." Natasha smiled as she hugged him tightly.

They stayed still, speaking naught but just hearing each other's breathing sound and heartbeats. The warm embrace from Loki was just enough for Natasha to fall asleep. And she would be sleeping anytime soon was all she knew right now.

Until Loki spoke.

"They say we never kill our demons we just began to live above them."

"How can we live above them, when we're just worse than them."

"Maybe we are. We would not have had known if we were."

We know we are.

"But this time, we'll kill our demons. Together."

"Together."

_ -Blackfrost_

* * *

**So this was all guys for volume I of 'A Fairytale Called Blackfrost.' I know what you guys would be saying like where's love scene? We all were waiting for it and blahblahblah…before saying anything else let me tell you even I thought where did I go when I stopped writing this. I too wanted to write an amazing lovy-dovy scene but…. I ended up like this….but why? Then after thinking for some time, I realized something...**

**There's this quote: - 'you can make love to a woman you don't love but you can love a woman you don't make love to.' (This quote has to do nothing with the current situation we're dealing with but something after reading this clicked in my mind.)**

**There's a humongous difference between fucking each other and making love to each other. Right!**

**Natasha, when asked to Loki to make love to her. She forgot the true meaning of making love. **

**Making love is an overrated two words for fucking each other. I know it very well but let's just don't get into the reality thing and try to stay in our little fairytale world. **

**Fucking is like a quick-swift sex like you know what I meant (I'm not good with explaining, clearly tells why I'm so bad at math and science.)**

**So yeah, whereas making love is a slow and sensual way to discovering each other and then skin to skin, flesh to flesh thing and they became one flesh (Hallelujah), in easy way it's slow and comes with lots of orgasm and sensations (I don't have anything else to say #virgindiaries) **

**So now we came back after the glossary session.**

**NATASHA'S WASN'T READY! Yeah, you read that in BOLD she wasn't ready.**

**If you read comics and you've read 'Black Widow: deadly origin' you'll find out a different black widow in there, maybe they're just flashbacks but still she's different and there's one scene in where Alexei reveals himself as red guardian and said 'she wanted a family she wanted to have children, be a mother' **

**So that Natasha knew what love was, what was making love; having a partner, a good life and all beautiful things…she even wanted to be a mother**

**But!**

**That was way….long….before…..**

**It was before, what? 60 years or more.**

**And after that many things have had happened to her. That made her question her own emotions and feelings. Somewhere in this way of life her has made her to just forget what it was like to feel real. To feel real emotion and what it is like to be her….because who knows how many times she had lived up in her life with disguises.**

**She knows to fuck up but not to make love.**

**This thing is tricky, complicated and I also get confused when I went on with the flow of writing and stopped to nowhere.**

**OKAY, SO THIS NOTE IS DEDICATED TO THOSE WHO ARE TOO LAZY TO READ ALL ABOVE I'VE WRITTEN. SO IN THE NEXT VOLUME OF THIS SERIES 'Like Lovers Do' THERE WILL BE A LOVE SCENE( MAYBE ) I DON'T KNOW IT'S JUST I'M GOING WITH THE FLOW SO YOU TOO. I KNOW NOTHING BUT ONE THING ONE DAY THERE WILL BE LOVE SCENE OF THESE TOO.**

**I PROMISE**

**WHATEVER IT TAKES!**

**THANKS FOR READING THIS STORY**

**STAY TURNED FOR NEXT VOLUME**

'**LIKE LOVERS DO.'**

**LOVE YOU 3000!**


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